Alignment In Action

At the time this goes out, I’ll be setting up the space (with the help of Donna, my partner in crime) for the first day of the 6-week Yoga, Sex + Death™ course I’m leading in Los Angeles.

The lead-up to facilitating this course has been a journey and a practice, in and of itself. Every step of the way, imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and self-promotion have provided fertile ground for inquiry. But my favorite (and most unexpected) lesson thus far came in the last few days of registration.

From the launch of this course, I set for myself a maximum of 10 students, and a minimum of 6. But as time marched on, I began to realize that it wasn’t a matter of WHEN I would reach 6 students, but IF.

I was holding firm to my minimum, and felt that it was out of my hands. I would let the numbers decide for me: if registration closed and I had 6 or more, the course would happen, and if I didn’t have 6, it wouldn’t. I felt at peace with it either way, and (as I almost always do) I trusted that whatever happened was meant to happen.

There was nothing for me to do or decide.

As the registration deadline approached and it seemed that I wasn’t going to have 6, I noticed a thought tugging at me: is this boundary really necessary? Or am I using this story as a way to keep myself out of it?

I said from the beginning that my minimum was 6, AND I also said from the beginning that I trust that the women who show up are the ones who are supposed to be there.

Susan’s voice (as usual 😉) echoed in my mind: “This work will give you what you need.”

After sitting with it and talking it out with some loved ones, I came to notice - really for the first time, but also for the 1000th time 🙄 - that this wasn’t about trusting the universe, or God, or Spirit, or any external force to "show me" what was “right”, or what my next step “should” be. There was no right or wrong, but there were two distinct paths. This was about trusting and valuing myself enough to take responsibility and make the decision. 

It was up to me to decide, and then do.

Ultimately, I chose to put my money where my mouth is, so to speak. Or rather, to put my energy where my intention is.

I realized that the boundary that the Lucy from 4 months ago set was no longer in alignment with the Lucy I was meeting in this present moment.

And after making the decision to move forward with the course and these 4 brave women, I found myself in my kitchen and I noticed that I was doing a little dance while preparing dinner. I took it as a little "thank you" from my body for honoring what was true for me in that present moment, and a reminder that when I direct my energy where I want it to be, it amplifies.

In Love,
Lucy